Mother Nature

*this post may contain imagery that can put you off your breakfast/lunch/food for life*

Things I learnt from her in the past week…

  1. Kids will get sick when you are home alone;
  2. There is no birth control available on the market that is quite as effective as a sick toddler;
  3. Anything that said sick toddler ingests is increased exponentially when projectile vomited down the front of your sweater;
  4. Ponstel makes kids hyperactive ;
  5. Don’t watch the second episode of Law and Order, because said sick toddler will wake you up 6 times that night to make you pay;
  6. As with giving birth, vanity is thrown completely out the window and you can be seen taking a bath with said sick toddler in water with little chunks floating around;
  7. It is not good to be a sympathy vomited. It tends to get. Very. Messy.
  8. And last but not least, all this fun and games comes to an end just as ‘Daddy’ gets home.

Pffft. This blows. Chunks.

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